New Year, New Girl, 2K16

Oh! Hey! 

(well this is embarrassing.....)

HOW ARE YOU? I feel like it's been forEVER since I last saw you! 

And really, I have no one to blame but myself. 

I tend to do this with blogs/journals/any sort of documenting my life experiences,

but I have had so many people ask me about my blog that I realized that it was time to get back on the bandwagon. 

SO much has happened since I last hit my 50 pound mark and blogged about it.

I almost feel like a whole new girl. 

I started a new semester, 

with all new goals,

new job,

new internships opportunities (x2),

a whole new world of dating,

working out with my trainer,
new hair style,

and SO much more. 

(if you're nosy enough to ask me about any of the above I'd be happy to fill you in on my life) 

I can't believe that I am almost 8 months post-op!

Where has the time gone? 

My body is still changing so so much, but it sometimes it can be hard to see it in yourself,

even if the scale is telling you that it's true. 

It wasn't until today when I was going through my camera roll,

and decided to take some "update pictures" did I feel like I could see a difference. 

Total time: 8 months post-op 

Total weight loss- 85 pounds

(These pictures were taken only this last August, so about the last time I posted on the blog. I was about 50 pounds down in these before pictures) 

(this one is backwards, but you get the idea)

For those of you wondering, I am back to as normal of a diet as I think I ever will be.

I can eat a lot of things again, but with MUCH moderation.

If I get too much sugar, I get sick.

If I eat too fast, I get sick.

If I eat more than a palm sized amount of food at a time, I get sick.

But 8 months in, I've basically figured out what works and what doesn't,

and its become fairly easy to stay away from the things that don't go ever well. 

Since school started this fall, I've STRUGGLED getting to the gym. 

Over the summer I was doing so well, and getting so strong, 

but it was hard to keep up the routine when school started.

I've made adjustments to my school schedule, 

and I have moved back home so it is easier to attend "my gym" 

and I think both of these things, as well as some new found determination will make a difference.

I've started running again and I can already tell a difference between starting a cardio routine 80 pounds ago, and today.  

I am not perfect.

My diet is not perfect.

as I just mentioned above, 

my workout routine is not perfect,

but I'm improving,

I'm changing,

I'm transitioning.

I'm doing so well.

I am so blessed.

I am so thankful for my amazing parents 

who made this life change so possible and their love and support 

through the physical and mental pain of it all. 

They are my rock. I would not be able to do without them. 

If you have young children (especially girls) who struggle with their weight,

I beg you to read this article. 

As someone who came from a home that kept most of these rules, 

I can say that it made the world of difference. 

New years resolution 2k16- UPDATE THIS BLOG MORE FREQUENTLY.

(but seriously, feel free to hold me accountable and ask when I'll update again)

Current phone wallpapers:

Major Milestone- 50 pounds down

Today's a big deal.

As of today I am officially down 50 pounds since I began this journey.

50 pounds down since I started my 2 week pre-op all liquid diet.

Its been an emotional journey,

and just as mental as physical. 

Weightloss is definitely a mind game. 

Some days I totally see a difference and I am motivated by results,

others I feel discouraged because I don't feel like I "look like" I"ve lost 50 pounds. 

Even though these pictures are not "full body" they help me see a 50 pound weight loss difference.

The picture on the left was taken days before my "all liquid diet" started.

The picture of the left was taken a week ago

One thing that I have really been focusing on lately

(and that I am sure has finally pushed me through the plateau and getting to this major milestone)

is working out at the gym, and signing up for a personal trainer.

Now, do I really have the money for a personal trainer? 

No, no I don't.

But I am so glad I'm making sacrfices to do it.

She pushes me and motivates me to get things done on my own. 

She also makes me look about 7 feet tall in this picture.

please ignore the "post workout sweaty/fuzz hair"

Remember the picture on the left? 

Pre-op compared to yesterday

#thatbaggyshirttho

Thanks again for everyone's support. 

Thanks for the love and the well wishes.

And now, for some celebatory GIFs:

THIS VIDEO IS ON POINT.

Excuse the language, but I relate to this video on so many points.

So, really, how could I NOT post it? 

Back to work, back to life.

My one month surgaversery has come and gone,

which offically means,

its time to go back to work. 

I work at the kind of job where you meet lots of people,

and you stand on your feet for 8 hours a day.
After being in bed for a month, I would be lying if I didn't say that I sometimes feel like this:

But its so great to be back to work and back to "normal" life.

Last week I had a really great visit with the nurse from my surgeons office.
I expressed my conserns about the "stall" in my weighloss for the last two weeks.
She assured me that "I was doing great" to "stick with it" and "be patient"
but my favorite part was that she said
"This is normal".
What? Even with WLS you can hit plateaus?
#thingsIwishtheywould'vesaidbefore
She told me to think of my weightloss as more of a stair case downward than a hill.
I will loose some, stall while my body is figuring it all out,
then loose some, then stall,
then loose and so on.
This brought me a lot of comfort.
I had felt like I was being so careful and not seeing the results that I wanted.
So, just like with everything else in this world,
Lexi's gotta learn more patience.

About a month and a half out updates: 
-I have cut out fruit and as many carbs as possible.

#scarytrue

The nurse mentioned that I might have "jumped the gun" introducing fruits to my diet, thus, causing plateau.
And so, I mostly eat protien, veggies, and dairy (cheeeese).

-My new favorite thing is bruchetta and feta omlettes for breakfast
(or as my youngest brother calls it- Stinky cheese omlette)


-I have officially signed up for my first voluntery 5k.
And, of coarse, its right up my diagon alley:
(smirks at my own wit)

I figure it will be a great thing for me to look forward too and work towards a exercise goal.
You know, to get my butt to the gym.
I have been training using the nifty Couch to 5k app,
and it me to listen and jog to this playlist
If you are interested in joining me, sign up here.
(It's in August so you have plenty of time)

-My new phone wallpaper reminds me to not accept mediocraty:

-It's like target GETS me: 

#hearhear

And then there is this: 

P.S. Thanks again for all the love and support! I've come to realize how many people are interested in this journey, and how many questions you might have. I'd love to have an entire post answering your questions, so leave a comment below, or message any questions about weight loss surgery you might have. xoxo

Let this curse be broken.

Can we just start with how hard this made me laugh? 

What a good week it's been. 

It's been the first week that I've started feeling more like myself. 

Ok, not 100% (I still get lightheaded and have some back problems)

but I'm up, and about and working out without wanting to kill myself.

So I'm great! 

It was a really great week, 

and now that I think about it, a lot of things happened. 

Because this is my blog,

and I can write about what I want, 

I'm doing to do a weekly recap. 

If you don't want to read it, 

skip forward, 

don't read it,

I probably won't even notice.

Memorial day:

My youngest two siblings and I had the greatest time with some extended family visiting family graves and enjoying each others company. 

There were donuts and E.L.Fudge cookies a plenty,

chips and sodas galore, 

and I ate my cheese stick and turkey slices.

I felt really tired this day.

Because we spent some quality time at each grave site,

my aunt gave me a camping chair from her van to sit in. 

I spent most of the time sitting because I just felt too tired to stand for that long. 

Later that night, my family had their own BBQ in the backyard with classic hamburgers.

I convinced myself to try to each just a patty

(Maybe hamburger meat could pass as a soft meat?)

but realized quickly after finishing that it was a mistake,

and spent the rest of the night sick. 

(And also playing to coolest game of Betrayal yet) 

Both Wednesday and Thursday I tried Sugar free, concentrate free smoothies at both Jamba and Roxberry. 

Neither of them were anything to get excited about, so I'm on the verge of giving up,

unless someone out there has a tasty suggestion! 

Thursday was my brothers graduation.

Another exciting family activity with loooots of food. 

But luckily Costco's Basil Pesto Tilapia saved the day.

I also FINALLY got my new gym pass at VASA, which I was excited to put to use. 

On Saturday we got a sweeeeet surprise.

My mom's uncle called us early in the morning to invite us on his private plane 

to a family reunion in Southern Utah.

I thought ahead and packed my snacks!

(Cheese stick, ziploc of turkey, even a protien shake just in case)

Since my surgery, I have been more motion sick than I have my entire life,

so I was worried that this little plane would make me violently ill.

We got all the way to escalate and I hadn't vomited once! 

I was feeling so proud of myself until I had to rush over to some bushes to see if I could cough anything up.

Luckily, there was nothing in my stomach to come up, so after a few moments of... coughing.... 

my body finally felt satisfied that I was going to be okay. 

Then I felt fine!

Again, as people around me munched and mingled, 

I enjoyed my cheese stick and my turkey. 

I stole a couple of my baby cousins squeezey applesauce pouches (yum!)

and by the time it was dinner, I was hungry, and had run out of food!

They were having Taco Salad, or Nachos 

and I thought that my best bet would be the Chili because it had some meat and some beans.

I was still worried because I had gotten so sick on Monday from the hamburger meat.

I took just a little bit, and prayed (literally) that I wouldn't get ill in the middle of the woods,

or worse, IN MID-FREAKING-AIR-WHERE THERE IS NO BATHROOMS on our flight home. 

Well, I am here to testify that God answers prayers, 

because I made it safely home without any Chili-induced mayhem. 

Even with my good choices this week, and my new exercising routines,

I have officially plateaued this week.

So. FRUSTRATING.

I really didn't think I would plateau this early in the journey. 

I realize that this is normal, but I'm still not happy. 

Honestly, as it might be that I'm not eating enough, or drinking enough water, or both.

But let me tell you, 

after a month of losing 5 pounds a week, i

its maddening to not loose anything this entire week.
Please, please, please, Let this curse be broken

#firstworldproblems #plateaussuck

Oh! hey! Remember how I was talking about the food pyramid??? 

Like, the NEXT day, I found this and it was just too perfect:

*Go back to working 8 hour shifts (on my feet) and not pass out

*Blog twice a week

*Get to the Gym 3-4x/ week

*Walk the dog days I don't get to the gym

*Track my protein/water intake every freaking day. Seriously though. 

1 week checkup and progress

Yesterday I had my one week check up with my surgeons office.

It was great for multiple reasons:

1- I finally got out of the house. 

2- Because I was leaving, I got showered 

(which takes 3 times longer than before)

 and actually got ready for the day. 

Hair, make up, the works. 

Even my mom couldn't help but say

"You look like yourself again"

..... Thanks? 

3- I got to ask my surgeon some of my questions

4- HE SAID I COULD START PHASE 3 OF MY DIET ON SUNDAY!

Oh I am so excited. 

I basically knew that I would be ok to move forward,

but after basically a whole month 

surviving solely on liquids,

I'm excited to move one step closer to "normal" food.

5- I got my drain out. 

(try not to get grossed out by this)

A tube was sticking out of my stomach since surgery,

and I normally didn't notice it,

but for the last few days it had started feeling a bit uncomfortable.

I was surprised that it really didn't hurt to pull it out.

He basically just had to clip the stitches that was holding it in place

and pull.

As I lay there and watched him pull on this tube, 

I was surprised mostly by the length. 

I guess I just imagined that it was a short tube,

but it ended up being about the length of my forearm!

THAT WAS IN ME! 

Other updates:

- I have become easily BORED. 

I am just not accustomed to "doing nothing" 

I try to stay busy, but I am just not used to so much unstructured time.

I am also SO BORED with my diet.

Sugar free pudding, sugar free jello, sugar free popsicles,

soups. So much soup.

Did I mention I'm excited for Sunday? 

- I no longer sleep all day.

- I have even gone some days without pain meds! 

(some days I am taking it every 4 hours on the hour, but hey... baby steps)

-My mom says she can already noticed that I look thinner.

I'm always the last to notice,

 but I guess that's a good sign.

-I don't handle the protein shakes very well,

but my surgeon said that if it's giving me a stomach ache, 

to not worry about it until I can handle it.

Hallelujah. 

The embarrassing part

Disclaimer: This post is incredibly embarrassing and a little bit T.M.I. (Too much information). In an effort to share my experiences, I think its important to share things that are not always comfortable or exciting. If you are easily embarrassed, you don't know me that well, or are a future potential dating prospect please do not read this post. 

So here is the deal:

My surgery was what we call Laparoscopic which means they make multiple small incisions

(which I will not post pictures of)

and they use tiny little instruments to cut my stomach out. 

This is awesome because instead of having to cut me all the way open,

I basically will only have a few smaller scars.

Rockin' and Rollin'. 

To make sure that the tiny instruments get the job done 

first, they fill my abdomen up with a gas so they can have lots of room. 

When the surgery is done, they try to get as much of the gas out as possible.... but....

some of it has to come out naturally.

On Monday, I honestly didn't feel that different,

but Tuesday and Wednesday had me feeling like Aunt Marge

Honestly it was super uncomfortable and a bit painful.

And no matter what I did, I just could not get any of it out. 

Seriously though it wasn't pleasant. 

My nurses insisted that all I would have to do is to get out of my bed and get moving 

and the rest would come naturally.

But let me tell you, simply walking around was not cutting it.

As weird as it sounds I think that part of the problem 

is that I still can't say I completely understand my own anatomy. 

Plus it didn't help that the Timehop dinosaur was totally taunting me.

Are you kidding me Timehop? 

Are you trying to make me feel even more frustrated with the situation? 

Rude.

By the time that evening came around, there was seriously too much pressure and it was painful.

This is about the time that my dad, my aunt Grace, cousin Isabella, 

and the brother in law Casey came to visit. 

My dad had me sitting on couch patting my back like he was trying to burp a baby

ok, because honestly that is exactly what he was doing.

Grace and Isabella thought the whole things was hysterical.

Before I knew what was happening they were chanting

"fart! fart! fart!" 

with the door wiiiiiide open for the entire floor to hear.

Next came the paper towel "inspirational" posters trying to motivate me.
"fart on"
"get the fart out!"
and simply just
"fart!"
Now I wish I had taken pictures, but I think I was so embarrassed that I didn't even consider it.

#awkward.

Night before surgery

Tomorrow's the big day!

I can't believe it's already here!

People keep asking if I'm nervous, 

but I'm not! 

Not even close!

I'm excited! 

My life is changing.

I mean, I get that this is a really big deal,

and a pretty serious surgery,

but I also feel like I've waited a long time for this.

I'm just so excited that it's finally happening. 

I know that it's going to be hard,

especially the next couple of days.

I also know that I am maybe a little bit too optimistic,

meaning that I am maybe not accepting how hard this is going to be.

But I would rather be excited than scared at this point.

My cute friend Kaylie brought over the cutest care package. 

It was filled with all sorts of "liquid diet" and post op goodies:

Nail polish, crystal light, pineapple gum, and other fun things.

In her own words: "There is no such thing as a 'yay surgery!' balloon".

I am so grateful that I have supportive people in my life. 

Almost everyone is so excited for me and knows that this is going to make my life better.

I am so grateful for that. 

Here is the official "before" photo as taken by my nurse:

excuse the gross Dr.'s office lighting and the funny way this photo is framed

See you on the other side folks! 

(get it? May 4th....) 

All Liquid Diet- Day 12

Allllll liquid. 

Allllll the time.

 Day 12. 

WOW.

Day 12! 

It's actually a crazy cool feeling to think that I have been doing this "all liquid" thing for 12 whole days.

Motivating, you know?

Like- It's okay that sometimes its still hard, because I've been strong for 

12 whole days!

I had a group meeting with my surgeons nurse and all of his wls patients for may,

only 3 out of 7 of us showed up.

Isn't that weird? 

I don't know if its just me, but I feel like I want to know everything I can before this surgery

even though most of it was a review of everything we had learned from the nutritionist, exercise therapist and psychologist, I still wanted to clarify all my questions and really just understand as much as possible. 

I found out that my arrival time for surgery isn't until noon! 

I can't consume anything (even mints or gum) the entire day before I get surgery,

and I feel like my surgery will be a little late in the day,

which is a bummer, 

but I'm pretty sure that the hospital forgot to put me on the surgery schedule so I am last...

but whatever. I'm just excited to do it. 

Only a couple more days!

All Liquid Diet- Day 8

What a good day!

I started off the day excited 

because when I weighed myself I realized that I am down 10 pounds!

Well, I guess it makes all of the frustrating/ hard moments worth it. 

I had my last Dr. appointment with my surgeon
before the big day.
It was supposed to be the "scare you out of surgery" appointment,
so I was totally bracing myself.
But it didn't scare me-not even a little bit.

One thing he mentioned is that my Vitamin-D is low,
so he suggested that I start taking 5000 unit capsules
10/day until surgery
and then a regular dosage after.
I bought this brand from Costco:

Luckily they are small so it shouldn't be as bad as I thought

when he told me that I would need 

10 A DAY!

Talking to my surgeon and chatting with my nurse

got me so excited! 

I can't believe it's so close! 

I found this Tedx talk that I love:

Hardest part of the day:
My brother brought home 2 pizzas for dinner for the family.
......

the aroma was pure torture
but I stayed strong!

All Liquid Diet- Day 6&7

These last two days have been harder. 

I am so glad I haven't given in and just gobbled everything in sight,

but I would be lying if I said I wasn't tempted sometimes. 

Fav of the day:
Going to Olive garden for lunch

"Unlimited Soup without the Salad"

=$5

#winning

Avoiding unlimited breadsticks

= The hardest thing ever.

Ok. Not ever. But close.